Love&Infatuation
Being human, we develop feelings that sometimes we can’t even understand. If our feeling could be put in physical terms, it would most likely seem like a quilted blanket that went on for eternity, each thread a specific feeling. Sometimes these emotions end up tangled within us, and try as we might we end up misinterpreting them most of the time. Though, to narrow it down, one of the most confusing emotions many come across, young and old, is Love and Infatuation.
Love, it comes in many forms that were all familiar with. That park you love so much, the way you love how fresh mowed grass smells, the love you’ll always have for that high school sweet heart. Every one has encountered it at some point in life or will, it is an unavoidable freight train of confusion, happiness and sometimes pain. Love is something that not only confuses itself, but usually ends up confusing every other feeling you have. Many people say “follow your heart” or “the heart wants what the heart wants”, but these two easily thrown clichés can be completely misleading. Though following your heart for the sake of true love and a happy ending seems like a delicious thought, the feeling may not be true. In your heart lies wants, things you yearn for, like love, a common human desire confused by over given attention. The longing for love can cloud your mind, your wants leak into the reality of what is, mucking up the true scenario of what is usually happening, infatuation.
Infatuation is a timeless classic, its in every true love fairy tail, underlining every word. Infatuation is a feeling that can often be confused, when in fact it’s the want for physical touch, sexual contact, and mistaken for love because of loneliness, rules, fads and more. A perfect example of this is the lovely Romeo&Juliet, two teenagers who die for love, though when you really look into it they die for sex, for breaking the rules for once. Romeo and Juliet are both forbidden to see each other, their families hate one and other, this is when fueled their infatuation and makes it dangerous and luring. Though it all really began ion the most basic animalistic way, they see each other and find each other physically attractive. The infatuation between these two completely blind sides them, leading them to think they are in love and ultimately to their deaths.
Infatuation and love always come hand in hand, one can lead to the other. Love is a feeling to be wary of, though when you find it, it’s amazing. Infatuation is a very dangerous and enduring feeling; though it can be delectable it comes masked in trouble.
©HeyJude
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Voices Around Me
The rain was always keeping me on my toes these days, I always stared out the window, expecting something to jump out at me at any given moment. I was a walking paranoid mess when we came here for the summers. For the past 15 summers since I arrived in this unruly world, we have come here every three months out of the year. The house was old and needed repairs badly, at night it would creek like an over talkative child keeping me up all hours of the night. It was always non-stop. Outside my window was a lake, which looked like a black abyss begging for me to fall into it, I felt that it had murderous intentions. The woods surrounded out temporary house and lake like a protective wall. It trapped me here for what seemed like forever to me, the wind howled ferociously and taunted me of my lack of freedom. Nature was mocking me.
My mother would have made me a hot cup of coco right about now, with a bit of cinnamon, and always three marshmallows. She was a nice woman, always well kept, but Nature was my master now, I couldn't’t turn away.
I sat by the window for hours, staring at the sky that was staring back at me. I loathed the way the moon watched me and my every move, it whispered to me menacing stories. I just wanted it to stop, I wanted Nature to just leave me alone now. I could see the shadows moving outside, plotting their devilish deed to trap me here.
I did everything Nature told me to do, I followed every step it shouted at me and still, it would not go away. I did Natures reddish business, and now I sit here stained forever with guilt. Trapped by thought, I could not escape.
I wanted them back, I wanted my mother to stand up and breathe again. I wanted her to wash her velvet blood off me and tell me it’s going to be ok, but she just laid there. Her horror stricken eyes staring up filled me with guilt. I hope she knew I had to do this, I had no other choice.
I could hear the shadows coming for me, the wind was not far behind them, I could hear it angrily howling “youuuuuurrrrMmminnnneee”. I just wanted all these voices, the whispers and the yelling to stop. Why couldn’t they just leave me alone. I just want the to stop!!
I grabbed my fathers hunting knife and I ran out into the unknown darkness of nature. I had to leave them behind in the house, I hope they understand that this was the only why to save them. Nature cant get them now.
“Illllffiiiinnnnnndddyyyyouuuuuu…I aaalllwaaayyyyyssssssswwillll..”
No matter where I was, where I hid, Nature found me. I ran to the black lake, the moon was full tonight and lit it up like a stage waiting on its performers.
‘YYOUUUUU CANT ESSSCAPE MEEEE!”
I walked out as far as I could into the lake, until the water was just below my shoulders. I could see the shadows moving in towards me. The moon watched, waited for these shadow men to rip me apart. I cried, I was scared but I had to do this. I know that when this is all over I will have escaped the voices, everything will be ok.
“YOUUURRRMIIINNNE!! MMMIIIINNNEE!!”
“you cant have me!!” I shouted back in my frail and girlish soprano voice. I held up the hunting knife and pushed it to my slender neck. I looked up at the moon, to the wall of trees and to the shadow men around me. I said in a low voice “..you cant have me..”. I dragged the over sized hunting knife across my neck deep and swift. I felt a sharp pinch first, a warm feeling came over me, and then there was nothing.
Nature couldn't get me now..
©HeyJude
My mother would have made me a hot cup of coco right about now, with a bit of cinnamon, and always three marshmallows. She was a nice woman, always well kept, but Nature was my master now, I couldn't’t turn away.
I sat by the window for hours, staring at the sky that was staring back at me. I loathed the way the moon watched me and my every move, it whispered to me menacing stories. I just wanted it to stop, I wanted Nature to just leave me alone now. I could see the shadows moving outside, plotting their devilish deed to trap me here.
I did everything Nature told me to do, I followed every step it shouted at me and still, it would not go away. I did Natures reddish business, and now I sit here stained forever with guilt. Trapped by thought, I could not escape.
I wanted them back, I wanted my mother to stand up and breathe again. I wanted her to wash her velvet blood off me and tell me it’s going to be ok, but she just laid there. Her horror stricken eyes staring up filled me with guilt. I hope she knew I had to do this, I had no other choice.
I could hear the shadows coming for me, the wind was not far behind them, I could hear it angrily howling “youuuuuurrrrMmminnnneee”. I just wanted all these voices, the whispers and the yelling to stop. Why couldn’t they just leave me alone. I just want the to stop!!
I grabbed my fathers hunting knife and I ran out into the unknown darkness of nature. I had to leave them behind in the house, I hope they understand that this was the only why to save them. Nature cant get them now.
“Illllffiiiinnnnnndddyyyyouuuuuu…I aaalllwaaayyyyyssssssswwillll..”
No matter where I was, where I hid, Nature found me. I ran to the black lake, the moon was full tonight and lit it up like a stage waiting on its performers.
‘YYOUUUUU CANT ESSSCAPE MEEEE!”
I walked out as far as I could into the lake, until the water was just below my shoulders. I could see the shadows moving in towards me. The moon watched, waited for these shadow men to rip me apart. I cried, I was scared but I had to do this. I know that when this is all over I will have escaped the voices, everything will be ok.
“YOUUURRRMIIINNNE!! MMMIIIINNNEE!!”
“you cant have me!!” I shouted back in my frail and girlish soprano voice. I held up the hunting knife and pushed it to my slender neck. I looked up at the moon, to the wall of trees and to the shadow men around me. I said in a low voice “..you cant have me..”. I dragged the over sized hunting knife across my neck deep and swift. I felt a sharp pinch first, a warm feeling came over me, and then there was nothing.
Nature couldn't get me now..
©HeyJude
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Prejudice in America Today
Prejudgment, an assumption made about someone or something before having adequate knowledge to be able to do so with guaranteed accuracy. Ever heard of, “judging a book by its cover” ? Every single person in the world dose this, but some take it to another level, out casting, bullying and taunting people for prejudging them. This is known in the world today as prejudice. Its been with the human race since the beginning of time, and though its drastically decreased it still very much exists in America today.
One common prejudice that everyone knows about is Race. Race refers to the classification of humans into populations or groups based on various factors such as culture, language, social practice or heritable characteristics, but for a long while, it separated us by skin color. Yes, a hundred year ago or so, there were slaves of many races. And although we have come very far from that by giving them rights, protection, fair trials, and over all accepting them as our equals, there are still many who prejudge people according to their skin color. Some silently judge, but there are people who will shout it from the roof tops, some who can be violent and cruel. Skin color, or Race, is still separating neighbor hoods, creates useless gang rivalries, and can sometimes even be found in the most innocent of places like elementary schools, your grocery store, or even your apartment complex.
Religion is a very prejudicial subject for many too, its what paves a path in their life, and for many gives them meaning. Religion is the belief in and worship of a god or gods, or a set of beliefs concerning the origin and purpose of the universe. They tend to derive morality, ethics, religious laws or a preferred lifestyle from their ideas about the cosmos and human nature. This is a major wall in the building of prejudice, it’s a very touchy subject that’s separated people since we were evolved enough to think. There are countless religions in the world today, Christianity, Catholicism, Buddhism, Satanism, Hinduism, Baha’i Faith and many more, but its always been something to separate us as a society. Its caused wars, people today kill over it, fight senselessly over it trying to prove that their truth is better then others, when the reason most people came to America in the first place is for their Freedom of Religion. The acts of some of these religious groups, and I say groups because each church of a certain religion is not the same, but some of these groups have done horrendous acts all in the name of their belief, their truth.
Something we can’t look past now days is sexual orientation. Sexual orientation describes a pattern of emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to men, women, both genders, either gender, or another gender. According to the American Psychological Association, sexual orientation is enduring and also refers to a person's sense of "personal and social identity based on those attractions, behaviors expressing them, and membership in a community of others who share them." Whether we like it or not Sexual orientation is a big deal right now because people are more open about it and refuse to hide it any longer. It’s everywhere waiting to be accepted one day, though it seems as if America is split in half by this. A lot of people don’t agree with a sexual orientation other than a man and a woman together, some deriving from their religious views and some because its just “not natural”. There are many ongoing reasons to why people of different sexual orientations are prejudged, labeled as sinners, crazy, wrong or even freaks, but the main reason is because they are different. People fear differentially in others, especially when they think those people choose to be different, and its always going to be something that is prejudged, something that is going to hold us back as one human race. Like many situations before, we America have the power to accept, and to move forward with this.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices, though prejudice has decreased in this century by a land slide, its still every where you look and around every corner you turn. America today is ridden with prejudice and can only be healed of it by time and by a slow acceptance of every ones differences.
* it didnt need to be that long of an essay, so there ya go
©HeyJude
One common prejudice that everyone knows about is Race. Race refers to the classification of humans into populations or groups based on various factors such as culture, language, social practice or heritable characteristics, but for a long while, it separated us by skin color. Yes, a hundred year ago or so, there were slaves of many races. And although we have come very far from that by giving them rights, protection, fair trials, and over all accepting them as our equals, there are still many who prejudge people according to their skin color. Some silently judge, but there are people who will shout it from the roof tops, some who can be violent and cruel. Skin color, or Race, is still separating neighbor hoods, creates useless gang rivalries, and can sometimes even be found in the most innocent of places like elementary schools, your grocery store, or even your apartment complex.
Religion is a very prejudicial subject for many too, its what paves a path in their life, and for many gives them meaning. Religion is the belief in and worship of a god or gods, or a set of beliefs concerning the origin and purpose of the universe. They tend to derive morality, ethics, religious laws or a preferred lifestyle from their ideas about the cosmos and human nature. This is a major wall in the building of prejudice, it’s a very touchy subject that’s separated people since we were evolved enough to think. There are countless religions in the world today, Christianity, Catholicism, Buddhism, Satanism, Hinduism, Baha’i Faith and many more, but its always been something to separate us as a society. Its caused wars, people today kill over it, fight senselessly over it trying to prove that their truth is better then others, when the reason most people came to America in the first place is for their Freedom of Religion. The acts of some of these religious groups, and I say groups because each church of a certain religion is not the same, but some of these groups have done horrendous acts all in the name of their belief, their truth.
Something we can’t look past now days is sexual orientation. Sexual orientation describes a pattern of emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to men, women, both genders, either gender, or another gender. According to the American Psychological Association, sexual orientation is enduring and also refers to a person's sense of "personal and social identity based on those attractions, behaviors expressing them, and membership in a community of others who share them." Whether we like it or not Sexual orientation is a big deal right now because people are more open about it and refuse to hide it any longer. It’s everywhere waiting to be accepted one day, though it seems as if America is split in half by this. A lot of people don’t agree with a sexual orientation other than a man and a woman together, some deriving from their religious views and some because its just “not natural”. There are many ongoing reasons to why people of different sexual orientations are prejudged, labeled as sinners, crazy, wrong or even freaks, but the main reason is because they are different. People fear differentially in others, especially when they think those people choose to be different, and its always going to be something that is prejudged, something that is going to hold us back as one human race. Like many situations before, we America have the power to accept, and to move forward with this.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices, though prejudice has decreased in this century by a land slide, its still every where you look and around every corner you turn. America today is ridden with prejudice and can only be healed of it by time and by a slow acceptance of every ones differences.
* it didnt need to be that long of an essay, so there ya go
©HeyJude
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Our Destined Red Planet
I could never get use to the damp coldness of the Underground, I was alone on this world and forgotten to the universe. I never wanted to come here, but I had no choice, none of us did. The raids began in small villages, towns, then they began to move up to big cities. We tried hiding for a while, those of us who had to anyway, we had no place to go, no home because our family’s out casted us as “freaks”, or “monsters”.
We were thrown out to the street to disappear from their minds, to rot.
We took refuge in any place we could, sewers, abandon buildings, places people didn’t even know of , was our home. There was a whole underground world composed of us, helping each other out, strangers became family to me. I was the least freakish of us all. I had pitch black eyes, my lips, nails, and my hair were all pitch black. I use to have long blonde hair, a golden gift that was all my own, and it just disappeared overnight, and so did I. My family thought I was a demon, they said I was possessed that I had given in to the devil. Bullshit. The minute they saw me I was alone in this world. When the raids began, I ran away, I knew my parents would send me away to the ships anyway so I thought I would just get a head start.
In my new family there was Mike, he was a complete sweetheart who looked like a monster, black shaggy hair, his skin was a bright red, his eyes were yellow and his parents called him a demon too, I liked mike, I got along with him. Marissa was tough; she was a leader type and took care of us all. If there was a problem, she knew what to do. Despite the fact that she had purple scales, green hair, and very useful gills, she was probably the most normal of us all. The way she looked never bothered her, I asked her one day about it and all she said was “sweetie, I’ve always loved all eyes on me”. I wish I had what Marissa had, confidence. Sid was the man of the group, he and Marissa were together. Sid could blend in with anything, like a chameleon. He was the clown of our raggedy family, but when he had to be tough, he’d take you down in a fraction of a second. And then there was Jaden. He was always pissed about something, always fired up, which makes sense since he could set anything he wanted on fire, by simply touching it. As ripped apart as my new family was, I loved them.
We had been hiding in the underground for a while, the raids hadn’t found us just yet but we knew they were close. They were collecting us, shipping off to Mars so we wouldn’t ruin their precious home, as if it weren’t our home at one point too. I heard they were testing on other mutants, looking for what caused up to change. They treated us like animals, worse, they treated us as if we had no soul, no conscious like their own, and obviously ours was more developed.
I had dreams about the raids coming when we were asleep, and waking in a room, strapped to a bed. Then they poke, prod and cut me open, and theres nothing I can do to stop it, then I wake up. Drenched in sweat like id just come back from swimming. My screaming always woke everyone up.
And then it happened. The raids invaded the Underground, we were woken up by screams. There were people everywhere, shooting us, catching us. I was in shock; I could only stare at the stilled bodies lying on the floor. They had finally found us and my taped together world was falling apart once again. Sid must have taken out 20 men with guns, nets.. Mike stayed by my side, his goal was to make sure I was safe, and mine was the same to him. Jaden, of course, wouldn’t pass up this opportunity of destruction. I’d always stayed out of Jadens way, I always thought that on some level he was just mentally unstable but I was glad he was there that night. We all needed him. Marissa and Sid led the way, and we made it out to some back sewer pipes. It was time to find a new home again, rebuild it all from scratch. All I could tell myself was ‘al least I had my family, we were safe’.
The sewers were pitch black, but I could see, my eyes were like built in night vision. It was the only thing I loved about this mutation, I wasn’t afraid of what was in the dark anymore, because I’d see it first. I was in the lead, but mike was right behind me, ready to protect me from anything coming our way whether he could see it or not. That’s what I loved about Mike, he would throw himself in dangers way for me. As far as cute mutants go, I would think Mike was one of them, I admired the red, and I cold stare at his eyes forever.
We came to a cross, four ways and no one knew where to go. We could still hear the screams and mayhem behind us. I didn’t care which way we went I just wanted it to stop. Why couldn’t they just leave us be, let us live in the underground, we were out of their way and their world.
We heard splashes of someone heading towards us, a couple of someones. I could see that it was the Raiders, they found us, followed us, and they had their guns. They were going to tear my family apart. We all just began to run, and I didn’t notice it till it was too late but we all went different ways. Mike and I one way, Marissa, Sid and Jaden the other way. I couldn’t breathe, I wanted to run back and find them but Mike was dragging me forward.
My family was split.
I could hear the Raiders behind us, closer and closer. I looked forward and I could see a wall. Just a wall, a big cement slab of road block straight in front of us. There was going to be no where to go after that, I didn’t have the heart to tell Mike that it was all over. This was the end. We reached the wall, and above us was an opening with bars on it. Mike tried to bend them, but it was no use, they wouldn’t budge. The moon was shining down on us through the jail like bars keeping us from freedom, Mike turned to me and held me, he told me he would always be there for me. All I could do was stare into his big yellow eyes, all I could think of was how much I knew I loved Mike, and I never told him.
Then it all went black.
I had thought the Raiders were carrying guns, and they were, but they had darts to knock you out in them, not bullets.
I woke up on a ship, I was in a seat next to the window. I looked out that window and all I could see was the vast loneliness of space, and a big red rock that were were heading to, sentenced to death, torture maybe? I wasn’t sure just yet. I looked over to my right and there was Mike, looking at me with his big loving yellow eyes. My forever.
“ im sorry I couldn’t protect you Aria..” is all he said to me. I looked at him, I grabbed him, and I kissed him, I had always wanted to. And all I said back to him was “ I love you Mike”.. “ I love you too Aria”.
I leaned in his arms, waiting for what was coming. Whatever it was I was going to take it head on, I wasn’t going to give up hope. Home is where you make it, and for me, that was with Mike. I was going to go down kicking and screaming if I had to.
©HeyJude
We were thrown out to the street to disappear from their minds, to rot.
We took refuge in any place we could, sewers, abandon buildings, places people didn’t even know of , was our home. There was a whole underground world composed of us, helping each other out, strangers became family to me. I was the least freakish of us all. I had pitch black eyes, my lips, nails, and my hair were all pitch black. I use to have long blonde hair, a golden gift that was all my own, and it just disappeared overnight, and so did I. My family thought I was a demon, they said I was possessed that I had given in to the devil. Bullshit. The minute they saw me I was alone in this world. When the raids began, I ran away, I knew my parents would send me away to the ships anyway so I thought I would just get a head start.
In my new family there was Mike, he was a complete sweetheart who looked like a monster, black shaggy hair, his skin was a bright red, his eyes were yellow and his parents called him a demon too, I liked mike, I got along with him. Marissa was tough; she was a leader type and took care of us all. If there was a problem, she knew what to do. Despite the fact that she had purple scales, green hair, and very useful gills, she was probably the most normal of us all. The way she looked never bothered her, I asked her one day about it and all she said was “sweetie, I’ve always loved all eyes on me”. I wish I had what Marissa had, confidence. Sid was the man of the group, he and Marissa were together. Sid could blend in with anything, like a chameleon. He was the clown of our raggedy family, but when he had to be tough, he’d take you down in a fraction of a second. And then there was Jaden. He was always pissed about something, always fired up, which makes sense since he could set anything he wanted on fire, by simply touching it. As ripped apart as my new family was, I loved them.
We had been hiding in the underground for a while, the raids hadn’t found us just yet but we knew they were close. They were collecting us, shipping off to Mars so we wouldn’t ruin their precious home, as if it weren’t our home at one point too. I heard they were testing on other mutants, looking for what caused up to change. They treated us like animals, worse, they treated us as if we had no soul, no conscious like their own, and obviously ours was more developed.
I had dreams about the raids coming when we were asleep, and waking in a room, strapped to a bed. Then they poke, prod and cut me open, and theres nothing I can do to stop it, then I wake up. Drenched in sweat like id just come back from swimming. My screaming always woke everyone up.
And then it happened. The raids invaded the Underground, we were woken up by screams. There were people everywhere, shooting us, catching us. I was in shock; I could only stare at the stilled bodies lying on the floor. They had finally found us and my taped together world was falling apart once again. Sid must have taken out 20 men with guns, nets.. Mike stayed by my side, his goal was to make sure I was safe, and mine was the same to him. Jaden, of course, wouldn’t pass up this opportunity of destruction. I’d always stayed out of Jadens way, I always thought that on some level he was just mentally unstable but I was glad he was there that night. We all needed him. Marissa and Sid led the way, and we made it out to some back sewer pipes. It was time to find a new home again, rebuild it all from scratch. All I could tell myself was ‘al least I had my family, we were safe’.
The sewers were pitch black, but I could see, my eyes were like built in night vision. It was the only thing I loved about this mutation, I wasn’t afraid of what was in the dark anymore, because I’d see it first. I was in the lead, but mike was right behind me, ready to protect me from anything coming our way whether he could see it or not. That’s what I loved about Mike, he would throw himself in dangers way for me. As far as cute mutants go, I would think Mike was one of them, I admired the red, and I cold stare at his eyes forever.
We came to a cross, four ways and no one knew where to go. We could still hear the screams and mayhem behind us. I didn’t care which way we went I just wanted it to stop. Why couldn’t they just leave us be, let us live in the underground, we were out of their way and their world.
We heard splashes of someone heading towards us, a couple of someones. I could see that it was the Raiders, they found us, followed us, and they had their guns. They were going to tear my family apart. We all just began to run, and I didn’t notice it till it was too late but we all went different ways. Mike and I one way, Marissa, Sid and Jaden the other way. I couldn’t breathe, I wanted to run back and find them but Mike was dragging me forward.
My family was split.
I could hear the Raiders behind us, closer and closer. I looked forward and I could see a wall. Just a wall, a big cement slab of road block straight in front of us. There was going to be no where to go after that, I didn’t have the heart to tell Mike that it was all over. This was the end. We reached the wall, and above us was an opening with bars on it. Mike tried to bend them, but it was no use, they wouldn’t budge. The moon was shining down on us through the jail like bars keeping us from freedom, Mike turned to me and held me, he told me he would always be there for me. All I could do was stare into his big yellow eyes, all I could think of was how much I knew I loved Mike, and I never told him.
Then it all went black.
I had thought the Raiders were carrying guns, and they were, but they had darts to knock you out in them, not bullets.
I woke up on a ship, I was in a seat next to the window. I looked out that window and all I could see was the vast loneliness of space, and a big red rock that were were heading to, sentenced to death, torture maybe? I wasn’t sure just yet. I looked over to my right and there was Mike, looking at me with his big loving yellow eyes. My forever.
“ im sorry I couldn’t protect you Aria..” is all he said to me. I looked at him, I grabbed him, and I kissed him, I had always wanted to. And all I said back to him was “ I love you Mike”.. “ I love you too Aria”.
I leaned in his arms, waiting for what was coming. Whatever it was I was going to take it head on, I wasn’t going to give up hope. Home is where you make it, and for me, that was with Mike. I was going to go down kicking and screaming if I had to.
©HeyJude
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