Will You Be Mine?

Will You Be Mine?
I’ve been seeing her for weeks now, every morning she rushed through the cold to get her medium coffee, and every night she fell asleep to her music, fearing the silence of the night without it. I first saw her at a music shop, I was getting my violin restrung and so was she, it was fate. It was the smell of her coffee that caught my attention, caramel swirled in the air around me. I turned to find her,a water fall of orange flowed down to her alabaster skin, she had big green eyes that reminded me of ponds and a distinct birth mark on her chin that id grow to love..
After watching her and getting to know her for the past four months, I decided that I needed to talk to her. Just being around her in the shadows of the day wasn’t enough anymore, I needed her with me always I burned for it, for her. I wanted to taste her sweet lips on mine, I wanted her to hold onto me and never let go. I wanted to wake up to her entrancing scent every morning instead of catching its stale and long gone presence.
I needed her.
I prepared a room just for her, if we were going to be a couple she would need he own space sometimes. I worked on the room relentlessly, it needed to be spectacular, it needed to wow her. I bought her favorite 700 thread count silk sheets for her bed, five pillows two with frilled edges for decoration, which she never slept on because they bothered her when she slept, and one knitted blanket for cold nights. It was exactly like the bed she had at her apartment, a deep green that matched her wondrous eyes and a dim gold trim, I know she will love it.
She was my life now, my Amanda; I had everything I knew she would love from her favorite shampoo down to her scented candles that she lit every night before bed. I had spent countless hours getting to know her, changing my world for her and now, well now we were in love.
Today was the day, I was ready and all set up. I had her favorite color on, a deep green sweater and I even had on a cologne I knew she liked on, I was ready. Amanda would see me today, she would see me the way I see her, it will be perfect.
I followed her into her regular coffee shop; I ordered the same thing she got every morning to spark a conversation.
“ So..uh, you like the caramel latte too huh?” She looked at me a bit startled but gave a slight smile.
“yes..” she coughed up, “but I like mine with soy milk you know? It tastes a bit sweeter to me that way”
I panicked for a moment, soy! I forgot to add soy milk to my latte like she dose religiously every morning. How could I be so stupid, I can’t screw this up.
My latte was finished first, I planned it out so that I would be the one to walk away first.
“well”, I looked at her with my deep gray eyes and half smile “guess ill see you around uh.. I didn’t catch your name”
She smiled.
“Amanda, my name is Amanda”
“well I’ll see you around Amanda..uh, my names Allen by the way”
I turned and began to walk away, I took a sip of my steaming latte and then turned back around with my cell phone in hand.
“Hey Amanda, can I uh, can I maybe get your number?”
She looked me up and down playfully; kindly she took the phone from me and typed in her number. I knew it, she loved me.
I don’t know what happened; we were having such a great time. We were having dinner at this Italian place I knew that she loved, she had gone there many times for her ritualistic girls night out. Now here she laid, a gash on her head, bleeding, her limp pale body begged me to scoop her up and hold her.
I took her back to my apartment that would soon be ours, I laid her on the bed I had for her in the room I prepared specially for her. I’d wait for her to wake, I closed the door and locked it.
Hours later I heard her banging on the door, screaming to let her out, why was she so mad? Everything I did, I did for her. I turned my life upside down to satisfy her needs to give her what she wanted and this is what she dose?
From inside my room I could hear her faint “Let meeee out! Please! Don’t hurt me Allen please!”
Hurt her? I didn’t want to hurt her! I loved her, I wanted to be with her forever. Ill go talk to her at midnight, she had to understand, she would. And she’ll find me romantic for it, at midnight it will be the fourteenth, February fourteenth Valentine ’s Day, the day of love.
I waited till Amanda tired herself out, and then I slipped inside into the light, no more shadows. She was sitting in a corner sobbing, her hands covered her face.
“why are you crying?”
She looked up at me with her full green eyes, squinting from the tears but staring as if I were a monster. Her eyes could be so cruel, just like I could be so cruel..
I grabbed her by her wrists and lifted her up, she was so light. She tried to fight back but she wasn’t strong enough. I had control of her dainty little wrists now, she wouldn’t stop moving, she was making me hurt her.
“why are you doing this! What did I do!?”, her words started to slur with her crying. “please! I know your not a monster, please just let me go Allen!”
I pinned her to the ground, both wrists in one hand and my other brought a kitchen knife up to her tender neck that I dreamt of every night. She let out a quick gasp, the cold steel of the knife gave her small body goose bumps, I could feel them on her wrists.
She was so beautiful, even with her wet cheeks and messy orange hair, she was so perfect. I looked up at the clock that was set on the bed stand, digital so she could listen to her music on the radio, she loved music.
12:00am
It was time, this was it. I looked down at terrified yet angelic face
“Amanda..” , I took a breathe, “Will you be mine?”
I pressed the knife to her neck.

3/28/2011 - This story was picked for First Place in the Fiction section of a writing contest for "The Midtown Journal"

©HeyJude